New glasses

– Medication

– Gym membership (maybe)

– Computer repair

– Return library book

– Print additional resumes

– Attend group at church

– Attend seminar at community job centre

– Finish painting

– Submit job applications

– Prepare for interviews

– Charge quartz crystals (GW2)

– Eat

– Shower

– Wash clothes

– Keep in touch with friends

– Keep in touch with recruiters (Rob, Amy)

– File taxes

– Update internet password

– Update internet plan

– Pay phone bill

– Pay rent

– Pay power bill

– Pay internet bill

– Practice memory games

– DO this stuff

– Call grandparents

– Write daily journal

– Go for walks

– Smoke

– Eat eggs

– Drink redbull type drinks

You want icecream right now

– Exercise

– Watch TV

– Listen to the news

– Read a new book

– Loook up schedule for the job centre

– Attend a job fair

– Email some of my closer contacts to ask them about open positions

– Find out about new job search boards

– Get some rest

– Finish the dishes

– Lock the doors

– Check the mail

– Attend church

– Watch Wednesday Prayer

– Prepare for small group on Friday

– Vacuum

– Sweep

– Put clothes away

– Read bible

– Get printer ink

– Do a puzzle

– Play wow

– Connect with Wow friends

– Sell paintings

– Give away old unused items

– Do a random act of kindness

– Get lightbulbs

– Put in maintenance requests for work to be done in building and apartment

– Wash bathroom

– Urinate

– Shit

– Ejaculate

– Clean ears

– Buy shampoo

– Talk to self in mirror

– Listen to music

– Work on side business

– Home renovation

– How to do all this stuff with the time I got when I’m not motivated?

– Charge headset

– Charge phone

– Replace mouse battery

– Write book

– Come up with answers to common interview questions

– Sit and mull

– Call crisis line

– Scavenge for items people leave behind

– Play CDs

– Get CDs from library

– Watch porn

– Message sister

– Buy gifts for family

– Clean closet

– Donate used clothes

– Replace items for doing the above

– Bargain shop

– Water plants

– Visit plant store

– Put away dishes

– Hang and put away clothes

– Fluff pillows

– Make bed

– Search internet for ideas

– Email self

– Connect with new people on linkedin

– Update resume

– Update cover letter

– Think about the past

– Worry

– (-No daydreaming)

– Muse

– Roleplay

– Search for inspiration

– Cry

– Get angry

– Pace the floors

– Call someone I know to talk to them

– Vape

– Listen to upstairs neighbours

– Bang on walls

– Bang on floor

– Bang on ceiling

– Spill things

– Cook pasta dinner

– Talk to google device

– Talk to portal device

– Talk to self

– Mumble

– (-don’t spit)

– Type

– Write emails to self

– Write to do lists

– Play connect the dots

– Rearrange furniture

– Contemplate life

– Contemplate death

– Contemplate magic

– Contemplate previous family history

– Think about old proverbs

– Think about symbolism

– Pronounce thoughts in head

– Fight against self doubt

– Work on ambitions for the future

– Think about all the good things I’ve done or that have happened to me

– Practice being mindful of friends and neighbours

– Give ammo to young boys that are bored

– Have phone sex

– Sext

– Cause trouble in the hallways (in a subtle retractable manner)

– Spin in chair

– Dance

– Look around at apartment and how beautiful it is

– Smirk

– Turn around and see the world outside is okay weather wise

– Overthink words and their meanings

– Invent new ways to look at things

– Remember previous loves

– Delete and retrace things that I’ve regretted

– Send messages to old flings

– Create new thoughts in my head about positivity

– Hang up coats and hats

– Find things I didn’t know I had

– Move around the artwork in my apartment

– Smell things in my apartment

– Fart

– Burp

– Listen to my gut

– Whisper sweet nothings in my ear

– Argue with the frustrating things I hear in music

– Smile when someone says something nice to me

– Encourage others through kind words

– Tap on keyboard

– Give away and then pick up items I own that I should keep for sentimental reasons

– Take clothes laying outside to the donation bin

– Take out the garbage

– Look at the racoons eating out of the garbage

– Predict if neighbours are outside

– Sing

– Play with lighter fire

– Buy stuff at the stores I like

– Overspend

– Look at financial plan

– Try finding ways to save money

– Suffer in silence

– Acting normal

– Contemplate finishing this list soon

– Repurpose items that haven’t been used in a while

– Put glasses on

– Put glasses down on table only to lose them again

– Make coffee

– Make tea

– Drink milk

– Boil water in kettle for soup

– Buy nespresso cups for coffee machine

– Make toast

– Eat honey

– Buy margarine

– Replenish eggs

– Cook perogies

– Wash pans and coriander

– Use spices on food

– Hoarde gifts for later in life for my nieces

– Online shopping

– Watch the time go by

– Listen to the clock

– Wash the tea towels

– Wash the bath towels

– Throw items into garbage that are useless for me

– Donate money to charity

– Talk to stuffed animals

– Hug animals

– Say sweet or kind things to friendly neighbourhood pets

– Turn lights on or off

– Imagine what life could be if it were simpler

– Find my virtues

– Find my values

– Assert my values

– Fall prey to life’s temptations

– Fix mistakes

– Regret

– Double think

– Race

– Hear new sounds

– Watch the cars go by

– Listen to building bustle

– Nod head

– Doze off

– Fuck something up

– Fuck someone

– Repeat?

– Invent again

– Smoke again

– Regret

– Wow

– GW2

– Lose track of thoughts

– Improvise

– Sit

– Pay attention to surroundings

– Pray for life

– Hear the music

– Conjure purpose

– Wonder what to do with the present

– Wonder if the past affects the present

– Lose track of internal thought

– Pull internal thought back

– Wonder when to stop

– Get tired

– Feel body noises and feelings

– Overpush

– Overclock

– Make more mistakes

– Sttttttooooooppppppppppp.

– Remember to add something to list whist making some mistakes

– Accept imperfection

– Turn head

– Remember that my vape needs charged soon

– Wonder why I started this list

– Perfect opportunity to talk to something or someone

– Typing is some relief because of my computer usage being quite high this week. I’m trying to turn it into a perfect way to end the night but that means I will contemplate death and onwards because I didn’t stop at the most opportunite time. The thought changes back to time, and I lose or choose to ignore it. The internet is watching me sometimes, of course, that’s AI or whatnot, and I wish that there was some more income and growth in my life, and that the people surrounding me would be as blessed as sometimes I have felt. I am thankful for the chances I have and do take everyday to make myself into a better person, and I pray that going forward I would put my mind towards more positive interaction, calming repose, and also potentially that I will seize the future opportunities (i mean, if they’re safe for me). I know risk, change, growth and capitulization are important, and God has shown me that everyday I do more than I realize, and that means I have to choose positively and proactively as well how I will lead myself and others into a better self. 

– I can’t do everything in one day, and there’s a lot more I’ve done that I can’t even add to this list because it would be eternally endless – but I know that with the power I have, I will continue to make all the necessary choices to survive.

God makes it possible, I make it happen.

Cheers,

Matthew

P.S. I love you